The paradox

The world is full of paradoxical moments. I thought about this all night until sleep took me and decided I just have to write about it. I wondered if I hated or loved people who claimed to be paradox of what they say or claim to be.

Abundance thrives here

I wondered if I loved the people who say they hate lies yet are core liars themselves. People who committed abortions yet support the ban of abortion rights in some countries and celebrate it.

People who claim they can tell the different between and artist craft and their personality which is why they support artists and people who have been accused of gruesome things. They listen to their music for their talent, yet delete their friend’s creative art and badmouth it because they fell out. I thought you have knowledge of distinguishing talent from personality?

People who say they do not wish to cheat yet consume sexual contents on the daily on the media.

Those who claim to be fit fam but secretly wish they had money for surgery because only surgery gives them the perfection they crave.

Life is full of paradoxical moments. Most people do not say what they mean. My friend told me, “you know the mouth can say one thing but the mind says another right?”

I said, “no!”

I do not know that. I have never not meant what I said and that is my fear when I speak. I speak from my heart and worry everyone else is speaking because they ought to just say something.

I mean the words I say and back them up with actionable points because I should. I believe that is what I ought to do. I believe that is the only way to be. But alas, it isn’t so for everyone.

I’ve watched women claim to hate someone and see them right after and become so sweet and kind to them. Yet they hate this person. I cannot do that. I cannot pretend for long. It feels so heavy to do so.

If I claim to support you I do so. And once I do not you will know I do not and the permanence of it will be felt. However I understand the compartments there is and do not crucify the whole. I can have parts of it that’s fine and I can sit with but not the whole.

However people desire you accept the whole and even with the rotten patch of it and pretend it is sweet too.

On success

This is same with the way the media portrays success. We've all seen the image or I hope most of us have seen this image.

The image where a vibrant, leafy carrot top contrasting with a surprisingly small root, or a lush green crown concealing a thin, spindly vegetable. On the other side there is a small leafy green carrot top with a contrasting huge root.

Whenever I come across this graphic it doesn’t fail to serve as a poignant metaphor for the modern paradox of success to me. One where appearances can be deceiving, and superficial achievements often mask a lack of true depth.

It's easy to fall prey to this illusion, to be swayed by the allure of quick fixes and superficial triumphs.

The media bombards us with images of "success" – often defined by fleeting fame, material possessions, or a curated online persona. This can lead us to believe that putting in minimal effort is acceptable, that mediocrity is the new standard. You just have to make enough noise to add to the already existing digital noise.

For me, I refuse to accept this narrative that my effort contrasts my results because I believe that true success, like a truly magnificent carrot, requires a deep and nourishing root system.

We get told daily, someone with less talent than you is getting twice the results you are getting. Yeah it might be true but that’s not all of it. There’s so much more, like a good name cultivated over the years, their location, their family, their school, their gadgets, etc. There are so many nuances to consider when making that wide assumption.

Some of us are the first pioneers of our families. It is totally normal to not break easy at first. We need to make the foundation solid first. And that demands consistent effort, unwavering dedication, and a relentless pursuit of excellence.

We are cultivating inner strength, building a strong foundation of knowledge and skills, and nurturing a growth mindset that embraces challenges and celebrates continuous learning.

However doing this internal work doesn’t mean we ought to look like shit externally? We don’t have to be the carrot that is dry and small on the outside while possessing huge roots on the inside.

You, we, us, can be – the "best of the best.”

Those who do not simply appear successful but also have a solid expansive inner core and a vibrant outer expression. The ones who have put in the "humongous efforts," the countless hours of dedicated practice, the steady commitment to their craft.

This is the path I wish to be aligned to and with. I do not wish to be swayed by the illusion of effortless success. Looking successful only while lacking inner core.

My experiences, your experiences, our experiences have given us a resilient inner core, a foundation built on hard work, perseverance, and a relentless pursuit of knowledge.

From these we nurture our talents, hone our skills, and strive for excellence in all that we do as the dividends of it pays off.

To appear successful and to achieve true authentic self that shines as well. A success that is deeply rooted and beautifully expressed.

This way we can grow a "carrot" that is strong as well as soft and vibrant too!

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Welcome to my new subscribers. I am Winifred Liam of Every Now and Then. As the name of my newsletter denotes I write every now and then, sharing my thoughts in a non structural way. As long as it resonates with you, I count that as I win. However, my first audience remains me, I write to give the thoughts that linger for long space to breathe through my words. You may like it sometimes, sometimes it may trigger you. One thing you’re sure to do with me is feel.

Nice to meet you, have a great day!