September blues and October jazz 🎷

September had a dramatic end for me but what are little blues that some sweet jazz cannot soothe?

I need a soft jazz club for October. I deserve new experiences for all of these stress I have undergone.

I am such a soft being. A clear heart with my joy-full like a child’s. My siblings are often amazed that a being as soft as me gets to be their elder sister. They marvel each time I step up to the task and do what I am meant to do.

But mehn sometimes life just wants me to toughen up and I refuse.

September was beautiful but the last weeks left me feeling numb. I lost two income from two clients and in this economy, that's no good news.

I didn't know how to feel but October first has me crippled to do anything because I finally agreed that it is okay to feel meh sometimes.

I hate to play about my money. I love love getting my coins because it helps me get what I want. Losing these two incomes has me really “mehhhhh”

I was telling my friend Opy yesterday that no matter how little my money is I love loving myself with my money.

Putting me on the back seat while other important needs like school fees and the likes take front seat feels like injustice to myself and it makes me cry.

I like me first always and I only exude abundance well when my belly is full, my skin glows, my hair and nails made, and my heart full of excitement from the silly things I buy from internet.

That's the best way I escape the reality called Nigeria. My money helps me do that.

Opy love pumped plenty plenty confidence in me yesterday with this brief message.

How do I feel?

Well, aside from feeling like a slave from asking for the salary I work for, I think it is one of these moments you are grateful that they happened.

I look forward to a beautiful October in every way and I am excited to edit my books because my friend became a Masobee Author fingering me to submit my own manuscript.

I am excited for October because I shall write more, love more, be pretty, do my nails and hair and go to my book club.

I look forward to having two great clients to replace the two I lost in September.

I look forward to loving mine with all of my heart and being there for the women who continuously hold me up when this world decides to give me another test for strength.

I look forward to enjoying the mundane like this cold bottle of 7up I just took this morning because I can.

I look forward to being soft and resisting all these women who have poor relationships with money from stressing my life.

I look forward to eating food with all of my heart and shaking up my noodle recipes in various ways.

I look forward to being authentically happy, joyful, and grateful for every day I get to thrive in October.

Enjoy the new month!

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Thanks for reading ♡