It's indeed a new year new me.

I knew this me before but she's worse now for good tho.

Photo by Nsey Benajah on Unsplash

I started this year with a kind of anger. I couldn't place it. I felt scattered, unsettled with no plans of what to do and where to go from the journey of 2023. I was still in the euphoria of 2023—I think I still am a little like 45%. By March 2nd maybe my new year would begin 100%.

However, despite the slow entrance into 2024 one thing is sure I feel different. Angry me is good for me.

It's felt so liberating to say what's on my mind and damn the consequences. I say my mind. I know I was vocal before but now I am vocal times 3.

I have ended friendships I was suffering at. I told them see, please, I don't feel comfortable doing this with you this year again please kindly exit from my life or quietly stay if you must.

One thing is I am comfortable with burning these bridges because I don't ever consider building bridges I've burnt with my hands or those burnt by others too. I don't go back. Ahead ahead is one of my mottos.

I like it here. I am angry at patriarchy, at mothers who suffer the girl child but give egg and fish to the male child just because he is male.

I am angry at friends who endure bullshit numerous times from men. I empathize but I am angry.

I am angry at Nigeria, the state of it, and how remote working gets harder by the day. I'm angry at users and exploiters. I am angry at capitalism. I am angry at society's standards. Everything is fucking draining and I am not tired.

This anger will take me to my answers so I am nurturing it and tearing down everything that has made mediocrity comfortable in my life.

I deserve to be poured into too. No be only me be best in support. I can be selfish too and I shall. I demand to be poured into wholly. You won't sit at my table if you don't pour into me in any way. I don't want to be with people for the sake of just being or nobody knows tomorrow.

I know today it is clear as daylight and in today you are not someone I will miss so go away and make room.

I feel alive too because I am not suppressing nothing. I am living, phew, expressing, allowing myself to be angry and to say what I truly truly feel. Raw, undiluted and hot!

If I had the money today I would go out and toast to me being so fucking awesome. Jesus Christ! Ahh I am not boxed. Can never be even if I try and I tried so hard. Naahhh

Cheers to being as authentic as possible. Feeling and owning up to it. Blocking who needs to be blocked, cursing who needs to be cursed, and blessing who needs to be blessed.

And taking out who needs to be shown the door. I love you so much Winnie. I love every era of you. May this era bring you more audacity to demand the absolute best and respect with the work you do.

May it bring you more than you have ever wished for and teach you great lessons for the future you.

Be in your angry era, change comes from it. Thank you for reading. 🤍