I write, so I live

One of the beauties of writing what I need more than what’s wrong is that years down the line or even months I get it. Financial freedom is my sole desire right now, so I write for it.

Photo by Alexis Antoine on Unsplash

Hello to you who care to read, I hope you’re well.

Today’s not the best Monday I’ve had. It’s so weird for many reasons. I feel like I am running out of time. This is a feeling that has come and gone since this year but today made it even worse. However, I turned off my laptop and slept for two hours, waking up now I wanted to write and process my thoughts and see what has been progress so far in this second quarter and even the first quarter. So this is more of an accountability newsletter to gauge progress and see if I am on track still and haven't lost focus on what it is I want.

One thing I love about writing my newsletters is that it puts me as the audience first and no pressure comes from me writing to an audience that I am paid for. So it’s like gisting your friends anonymously or the catholic confessions I used to have early as a child where instead of going to confess my sins I ended up telling the priest about my mom and how she didn’t understand me and how I doubted she was my real mom because she scolded me too much. 

On everything 

I need the money that comes from hard work tbh. I need the dollars. A lot of things would be stopped by more money. I need to be a big success on Upwork or get a long-standing client that pays 30 dollars per hour or 25 dollars per hour for 8 hours of work per day and 40 hours per week. I am not changing the world. I just want to ensure the six of us who my mom birthed are good people in the world. We have what it takes to be good human beings. At least if any of them goes differently it is on them but I sincerely hope not. 

A work I enjoy, this has been my prayer for the longest and I don’t know how I get sidelined each time I put myself on this goal. I don’t like where I am now but there’s great progress. I hate to be someone who sounds like a broken record but at this point, this job is making me feel like one and overshadowing the good my other job brings to my life and I hate that.

I don’t want to continually lament but each day they find a new thing that makes me want to run far away. People don’t see me nor understand me and that’s worrisome because I try my best to understand people and maybe that’s why I have had the patience to teach a child they termed “no hope” to read a full book—a proud win by the way. And teach a married woman of three to write two chapters of her book—another proud win. It’s also why I bring the best creatives on board because I tailor each outreach message per their profile and don’t just send a generic message to all and hope they respond. I take my time with the things I do and I hate when people don’t do that but people see it. 

One of the beauties of writing what I need more than what’s wrong is that years down the line or even months I get it. Financial freedom is my sole desire right now. This will not make someone think I deserve a car for slaving for years or a boy thinking if I reason with him now he would reward me with rich man’s wife status. I need the freedom money brings because if I decide to freeze my eggs now and have a surrogate for when I desire a daughter I can afford it comfortably. I need the freedom money brings because I need a bigger house, I want a big kitchen with a counter in the middle, I want to wake up and decide to pull down a window and have it rebuilt bigger for more ventilation because I like natural air. I want to build windows that allow natural air in while filtering the dust that enters my house. I want my house to be my shrine of comfort and I take pride in not allowing just anybody in it. I want my big house with a vast land where there’s a garden, a farm for animals on the other corner of it. I just want to live as peacefully as possible while working on the things I love, chasing the projects I love, and being with my loved ones. 

Life is so short and my greatest fear is that I’d die without fulfilling half of what I truly desire and spend my time catering to confused business dynamics where the goalpost shifts weekly. I don’t want to die without having sighed that yes I lived life on my terms and I am happy. I live life on my terms in some areas but currently, I spend a chunk of my time doing what I don’t like and every minute is so hard. 

What am I going to do about it or what have I been doing about it? 

First, I am editing my first manuscript on a historical fiction book on Gasper Yanga. I’ve been writing for two years now and I am almost done. I also rewrote October 22, it’s at 50k words now but going back to the story I am not sure I want to share more than I already did on that story. I’ve learned my lesson and I’ve moved. That’s not what I want to give to people yet. I am not ready for it. So I channeled the energy I would use and edit it to begin my thriller book—The Final Hour. I have great hopes for this one because my writing or storytelling style has improved so much after ghostwriting 20 books so far.

That even reminds me of my favorite client’s contract with me ends soon and I have nothing from Upwork, which also adds to why I am overthinking things and want May to speed up.

I have mastered Pinterest for marketing books. I need my Pinterest to be at 50k views per month to help me with traffic when I start to promote my books there. I am currently at 1.2k views still a long way to go but it is nothing a good strategy cannot achieve. I am learning TikTok marketing for books as well and I want to market them well without showing my face. I have studied businesses that connect without showing face and it’s been interesting.

I am in school learning and improving. I disconnected from all areas of distraction this morning—focus for three months and see what can be achieved in terms of Upwork, finishing my second book, and releasing the other. I’m transitioning to another field and it is hard but I am willing to put my head down and do it very well. I have no one else but myself, strong guts, and God. Things will be better this year before the end of this year. The four prayer points I have carried over for the past three years will come to pass this year by grace, faith, and my alignment to where I shall flourish. I have no zeal to endure things that don’t bring me happiness even minutely anymore. The whole of me rebels too much at the discomfort that brings. This is me courageously moving towards the things I align with as I rebel with what doesn’t. I hope by the end of this year I look back to May and thank myself for being courageous enough to leave situations in friendships and work that no longer served me.

On lessons

The only lesson today and forever is Winifred Liam you have the power to be a millionaire and a billionaire. Find a good product or service and push it with all your might. You have what it takes to open international doors. You speak well, you learn fast, and you are very passionate about what you do. Let no bloody person tell you otherwise. You are gold, you are solid gold. You have mad potential to teach, empower, and live a very comfortable life till you drop off the Earth’s surface. 

Your name shall be known. The work you’ll do will outlive you babe. Did I mention you are solid gold? Yes! You are! You are loved dangerously self, loved to stupor, loved excessively. You will make money in this life. You are making money, you will touch lives and teach as you love. You are awake now, no more sleeping on you and the potential you have. I love you soooo much Winifred Liam. I can’t wait to tell you, I told you it’ll turn out well eventually. Look at all the amazing people you have worked with so far, look at all the amazing people you will continue to work with! You will live a good life and your family will be called blessed because of you! Amen!

On goals

• All last newsletter goals have been met by 85%. This week I hope to round off all my May’s work in advance and focus on my Upwork account. 

• Pay the little debts I owe.

• Go on a solo date and just be in my presence as I communicate with my finances and Jesus.

Concluding note

There’s so much good in the world for us still. I believe it with all of my heart that lfe can be more than this ordinary life. I can’t wait to experience them all. Happy New Year in advance. I hope my next newsletter be filled with good tidings. I am a sharer of good news. Oh and talking about good news—a girl bought 10 copies of my book it made me so happy. I myself have been unable to buy one because of card issues, cheers to that. 

So take care, until next time!

Winifred Liam.